It's Been A Long and Bumpy Road

It's here, my three year anniversary of the day I began to take back control and live a healthier, happier life. It hasn't been easy. It hasn't been smooth sailing. It hasn't been perfect. But I am SO much better off today, no matter what the scale might say on any given day of the week. To celebrate and commemorate my special day, I hit the high school track where I thought it would be a bit cooler for a 3 mile run. I was mistaken. It was hot. 75*. 62% humidity. It was sunny. But I did it. I took a water break after mile 1 and mile 2. But I did it. It was a very difficult, slow run. 29:53. But I did it. I could have quit after mile 1. But I didn't. I could have quit after mile 2. But I didn't. The old Linda would have.

my alter ego, "Sweaty Spice"

This is the new and improved Linda. Even after all the trials and tribulations, I don't give up anymore. A bad day does not turn into two bad days, which then turns into a horrible week, which then makes me throw my hands up in the air saying "I'm done." I never realized that maintaining my new weight would be just as much work (if not more) as losing it.  But I am fine with that. I'll work out an hour a day for the rest of my life. I'll continue to eat double fiber whole wheat bread with tuna or turkey breast. I'll keep track of my calorie consumption and work in a treat here or there (usually both here AND there). I'll do whatever it takes to continue to look this way. Most importantly, I'll continue to do the hard work required to always FEEL this way.

Inspiration

I know a lot of you guys follow Katie already, so you might know that she just finished her 30 day challenge on the Wii Active. (YAY KATIE!) That got me thinking about the Wii Fit again, especially when I was in Gamestop with my son while he spent his birthday money that was burning a hole in his pocket. Katie made it sound like a really good workout without a huge time commitment. I really enjoyed Insanity, but I won't give up my runs or time at the gym, so it was hard to fit in another 45 minute workout. Our Gamestop didn't have Wii Active or Wii Active 2, but then it dawned on me, when my f-i-l got me the Wii Balance Board he also got me a Jillian Michaels' game with it. I NEVER opened the damn thing up!!

I've had it since 2009! Holy crap! Do you know how many exercise DVDs and exercise equipment I have bought since then? There was some more Leslie Sansone, some Gilad (hunk!!), the Brenda Dygraf air climber, a couple of Firm and Biggest Loser DVDs, Insanity... That's just in the last three years. I can NOT imagine the amount of money I have spent on fitness equipment in my lifetime that I thought would be the key to it all. With the major pieces like the Denise Austin manual treadmill, the Brenda Dygraf rowing doo-hickey, the Susan Powter step system, my Tony Little Gazelle(!), the Total Gym knock-off from QVC (who am I kidding, almost everything I buy is from QVC), then the Firm butt lifter package, the Ab-Doer, and my Richard Simmons stepper (that was EXACTLY like the one I just bought, but it broke from me actually USING it!), and all the tapes and DVDs along the way (not to mention my gym membership for the last two years...), we're talking THOUSANDS of DOLLARS!! And guess how I've lost the majority of my weight through the years? WALKING, which is free! Even running now doesn't cost anything, just replacing worn out sneakers now an then.

So, I'm calling for a moratorium on any more fitness purchases (except possibly a hydration belt- I need that for my long runs!). I will use what I have and I'm going to start by trying out that Jillian game. My balance board is all charged up and ready to go. I'll let you know if I want to curse her out like y'all do when you're ripping or shredding it!

A Beautiful Day In The Neighborhood

I wish I had more to write about. Life is pretty boring and uneventful when we're back in the every day routine. I guess I should be thankful, right? Yesterday was a typical summer vacation day without the kids I babysit. I did the usual on the computer and then spent an hour at the gym on the arc trainer. Holy crap- I miss the Olympics! I wound up watching Hoda and Kathie Lee, and they can be pretty entertaining. It really cracks me up that they're regularly consuming alcohol at 10am. Great gig if you can get it, huh?

I got home and spent an hour mowing the back yard and attempting to avoid all of Molly's piles of poo. If you didn't know we had a dog, you'd probably assume we had a horse! I then took a long shower to wash off what seems to be every spider web known to man that I managed to walk through while mowing and dumping grass clippings in the lot across the street. Nasty.

Bad girl on Chelsea's bed!

After getting pretty, I made dinner. Exciting, no? We were done early and it's been so beautiful so I asked Charlie if he'd like to go for a walk. We wound up taking a two mile walk around the neighborhood and did not get eaten alive. That's because we were actually armed with bug spray. Had we not brought it along, we both would have been two enormous, pulsating bug bites.

Today I babysat for the 1st time in almost 2 weeks. I was on vacation starting the 2nd, and then they were on vacation (to Disney World, the lucky ducks!) last week. School starts three weeks from today. The kids I watch will be in 2nd grade and kindergarten- full-time school for both of them. So, "working" from home will be coming to an end for me. I have not worked outside the home since February '96. I haven't applied for a job since August '94. It's nerve-wracking. I would REALLY like to do something with our school district, either being a teacher's assistant or a bus matron. I would prefer to still be off when my kids are off, even though they are 16 and 14. I don't want them sitting at home, fending for themselves or waiting for me or their dad to come home to help them with what they need, be it a ride to the library or to a friend's house. I feel I still need to be here and they still need me. The time when they won't need me will be here sooner than I think. Until then, I want to be around for everything.

So, I guess there are some things simmering on the stove. I need to find a job because we definitely need the money and, if you haven't heard already, our documentary From Fat To Finish Line needs money, too. If you can help it would be greatly appreciated. A pledge of $25 gets you a special edition DVD, and if you make a pledge and by September 13th (my 41st birthday by the way) we don't make our goal (God forbid!) your credit card does not get charged. You can pledge as little as $1!! My girlfriend Belinda helped out last night- thanks Belinda!!! Maybe I can work on a special thank you for my blog readers that help us out...

Change It Up

I knew I had to get some kind of activity in but I was just NOT feeling the gym and the arc trainer today. So, you'd think I'd pop an Insanity DVD into the machine and "dig deeper," but I didn't. I was hoping to get my husband off the PS3 and go out for a jog/walk. Even though I ran yesterday, it's beautiful out, sunny with an actual BREEZE, and I didn't want to waste that. Instead, Charlie suggested some tennis! We haven't played yet this year. Tremendous idea!

1987- Frickin' 25 years ago! Gee, which one am I?

We asked the kids if they wanted to head out with us, since A). they need some physical activity too, B). Charlie, Jr. played when we went away and he said "I SUCK!" (so he could use some practice) and C). it would be nice to continue to enjoy some time together before the chaos of school takes over. We are very lucky that our high school, which is 5 minutes from our house, has 8 courts. Thankfully only 1 out of the 1st 4 courts were being used, so we headed to the 2nd set of courts, so as not to interfere with the real practice going on. We only own 2 racquets, so we had to take turns. The odd man out was deemed "ball boy" and got to play fetch. I warmed up with Chelsea, if you could call it that. I think it was the 1st time she held a racquet. She was a good sport about it and seemed to attempt to learn.

After a while, I let my husband have my racquet, but I wasn't about to run after balls. I figured I could walk around the perimeter of the 4 courts while they played. Then I thought I could do a very slow jog instead. So I ran 8 laps. Then I played some tennis and then I ran 8 more laps. There was an awesome wind coming across the courts so it was SO much more pleasant than yesterday's run (it was also 5pm)! That made me think that maybe I should head out to the track more (I mean AGAIN!) for my runs. It's really a catch 22. I can run out on the street and the time goes by relatively quickly (not really) since there's so much to pay attention to, like the pitfalls of gravel driveways and oncoming vehicles, but I guess houses curtail the wind. I could run at the track out in an open field and enjoy the breeze, but you tend to feel like a hamster on a wheel, running around in circles. Then there's the treadmill at the gym, where I can play with the speed and run like the wind and get it done and watch the Olympics (What am I going to do with myself after tonight??!!??) That can get old, too. What to do, what to do??? Gee, maybe I could do it all? Duh.

Holy Frickin' Humidity

75*, 88% humidity. That was rough. 5 miles in 53:59. That SUCKED. Of course the sun was shining when I was out there, too. Do I have a visor yet? Uh uh. That might have helped, but I think it would have made my head feel hotter, if that was at all possible. Oh, and along those 5 miles only 1 person had sprinklers going, after 4.25 miles. I ran through them and managed to wet my knees. I shall have to work on my somersaults so I can get in and out of them like a ninja next time and manage to cool my head off. Of course while I was out there I thought about the cooling towels I've seen numerous times on QVC and in Bed, Bath and Beyond. When I got back to my front porch to stretch, my running capris were dripping onto my shoes. Everything was dripping. I nearly stripped outside, but I didn't want to cause a ten-car pile up from blinding drivers, so I left a trail of hard-earned sweat to the bathroom.

Well, it's done, at least I can say that. Only 8 weeks until my half-marathon. I think I can still pull this off. Pray for me!

In more interesting and exciting news, the From Fat To Finish Line- the movie website is up and running! You can read all about the team members and their success stories there. Content will be added continuously, so you have to keep visiting! There's also a link to the Kickstarter page to make pledges to help this film hit the ground running (pun intended). I've already got a special "Backers Only" DVD coming to me when everything's done!!





Snap! Back to Reality

Vacation's over. Wah wah wah. Lots of laundry to do and a house to clean. Damn dog hair. We had a great time at my sister's sister-in-law Linda's house on Lake Wallenpaupack in the Poconos, PA. Funny weird, right? Two of my sisters married two brothers and they have a sister Linda, too. And a sister LoriAnn (our sister is Laura Ann) AND an Aunt Roseann, with the same frickin' birthday! ANYWAY, we left Sunday and returned yesterday. We played volleyball and swam and played games and cooked and ate and drank (a little) and watched a lot of the Olympics. It was fun and relaxing at the same time, very laid back and casual. There was no running or rushing around for four days. Perfect.

If you guessed Lake Wallenpaupack, you guessed right!

 

The cat was let out of the bag yesterday! I wrote that post on Saturday because I knew I would have limited computer time while away and I wanted to let you know the big secret. It actually did post. No unforeseen technical glitches or "flat tires." And then it posted on AOL's Welcome Page this morning! It was only up for a few hours, but it was there, right on page 23 of 23!

That's me and the kids on the Brooklyn Bridge on my 37th birthday, 9/13/08.

AOL had to pick the most hideous picture. It drums up interest, just like a fight on a reality tv show. I love that my kids were in the shot with me! Too bad my husband wasn't included, but when I was selecting photos there weren't many to choose from. As a fat person, you never want to be in the picture. And I'm the family photographer, so it made it that much easier to be excluded. I'm just glad I couldn't find the few shots I have of me in a bathing suit, HONESTLY! Then I would have been apologizing to all that went blind while viewing the article!

If you missed it just click on this link: the Huffington post article. If you visit the site, you can read about women who have changed course and succeeded at so many different things later in life, not just weight loss. Anything is possible with hard work and dedication.

The Big Reveal!!

So, what I couldn't tell you before because I was so afraid to jinx myself was that my weight loss transformation is actually featured in an article and it's posting today! The last two months have just been surreal. I got the phone call on June 1st from Jen (you know, from our Ragnar team/Media Meld and her blog From Fat To Finish Line) that somehow, after hearing about our RR team, Ragnar Relay and Lori Weiss, a writer for the Huffington Post, had been in contact with each other and they thought my "later in life" reinvention would make a great story!

I spoke to Lori on the phone for about an hour so that she could get a good feel for my story and whether it would pass the test for her editor, 'That Girl' Marlo Thomas! (I know her as Phil Donahue's wife and the ambassador for St. Jude's Children's Hospital.) I was concerned that I'm not post 50 and my transformation began in my late 30's since the section Marlo manages is about life after 50. Lori said not to worry.

I got the phone call from Lori about a week later to say that the story was accepted and we then had to schedule a time when we could sit and talk, for about THREE HOURS!!! I thought, "What the hell do I have to talk about for 3 hours???" Wouldn't you know we wound up on the phone for 3 1/2 hours!!We talked about everything, starting from early childhood all the way up to my trip to Miami for the Ragnar Relay. I just never thought my story was all that special, but because I have no problem chiming in and "conversing" with complete strangers (namely commenting on Katie's blog!), all of these amazing things are happening! The stories of each and every one of my Ragnar team members are extraordinary because we are part of the 5% of people who have lost weight and are keeping it off. We are hoping that the documentary as well as this article will inspire others to believe in themselves and do it as well, no matter what your age.

After the phone conversation I had to get together pictures representing my life and the ups and downs of my weight. I also had to write down all of the information for each picture, like, for example, my kindergarten picture. I'm one of seven kids, and my mother was terrified that one of us would come home with lice and then the house would be infested, so she cut our hair so we ALL looked like little boys, not just our brothers! Add to that the fact that my shirt was turquoise covered in flower-filled vases atop gold end tables and you get the gist of my childhood in the 70's. Oh, and I'm chubby. FML?

I can't think for the life of me why I'm SMILING!!

So, Lori said that the picture gallery in the article can hold up to 30 pictures, so I sent 30 pictures! They can edit whatever isn't worthy, but make sure you click on all the pictures so you can see me through the years- too bad there can't be a soundtrack! I think I covered all the major milestones in my life, high school graduation, college, my wedding, the babies... Then the good stuff is covered, like my different races and finally THE MAKEOVER!!! I hope my new look meets all of your expectations since the anticipation must have been building for over a month! (NOT!)

The cherry on top of this most unbelievably decadent to-die for dessert? The Huffington Post article could make the AOL Welcome page, since they are owned by the same company. I'm on AOL daily because we have an AOL e-mail address since the dinosaur days of dial-up, (You've Got Mail!), so I click through all of the top story screens, from top world news to celebrity gossip. It's how I keep abreast of everything! Anyway, this could happen as early as tomorrow but up to a week later. Lori's last story did make it to AOL's home page, so *fingers crossed*...

About two weeks ago, Lori called to read me the article. I couldn't believe it was MY story. It brought tears to my eyes to hear what I lived the past 40 years from someone else's perspective, written so beautifully but so succinctly. My weight loss journey, the trials and tribulations, milestones and victories in less than 1400 words.

It boggles my mind that this is my life.


Head to www.huffingtonpost.com/50/ to read the article!

525,600 Minutes

I can not believe I started blogging a year ago already. It has been a great year. My mom and dad are doing well. My husband and kids are healthy and Charlie and Chelsea are thriving in school. My extended family is growing with nieces and nephews getting married and having babies of their own. We are doing well. Thank God. This is what's most important.

I've done so many new things in a year. I ran in Yankee Stadium and Central Park. I ran a 10k and have a 26:35 5k personal record. I experienced 'Sleep No More' at the McKittrick Hotel. I've also met some amazing people this past year. It all started with a Spark People post on Facebook in June of last year. One of their members had lost 125 pounds and posted a video of her journey, set to one of my favorite songs, 'Move Along' by The All-American Rejects. As the video played, I couldn't help but cry. There were pictures of her journey from every ten pounds down. WE may not see the difference when we stare at ourselves in the mirror, but the camera doesn't lie. It tells us the truth, whether we need to lose weight or we have taken it off. I was crying because I could sense her joy; I could feel the pride and sense of accomplishment she felt. I understood where she had been and where she finally had arrived, GOAL!

From that video, there was a link to this woman's blog. You may know her, (who am I kidding, most of you found MY blog through her!), she's Katie at Runs For Cookies. I started reading Katie's blog and I couldn't get enough. She had been blogging for a long time and I had a lot to catch up on. I loved how she discussed the difficulties of weight-loss and maintenance while being a stay-at-home mom, fitting in running and exercise around the boys' schedules, (we're all in the same boat), while weaving funny anecdotes about her life in general into her posts. I would comment on her stories, letting her know I was out there, a loyal follower! From Katie's blog I found other writers who were also on their weight-loss journey, either still working toward their goal or at their final destination, maintenance, like Jen, who lost 100 pounds, at From Fat To Finish Line. Every morning, when I woke up, I would take care of my morning chores, make my coffee, grab a bite to eat and sit down at my computer. First, I'd hit My Fitness Pal and log in breakfast, then I'd check Facebook for notifications and then I would log onto Blogspot and see what Katie or Jen was up to. It was fun hearing about what races they were training for or what their opinions were on nutrition and health products. I could commiserate with them, since no one I know was doing it here with me.

I had been reading for a couple of months when the urge to write my own story down hit me. "I can write a blog. I have thoughts." (What an awesome movie, 'Julie and Julia.' Writing and food. The only thing that could have made it better was if Julia Child was a runner. I'd love to have seen her in a sports bra and some spandex capris!) So, on August 3rd, 2011, I wrote my first entry about my story and how I finally decided once and for all to just do it, put in the hard work and effort and stick to it. The first day of my journey was August 17th, 2009. I can't believe it's almost three years. I hit goal on August 20th, 2011. I had my first child August 2nd, 1996. I guess August has been a really big month for me.

So then, just from reaching out to a woman and letting her know I appreciated her words, Katie learned about me and the things we had in common, our weight loss success and running. In January, Katie e-mailed with an invitation to run a Ragnar Relay with other people who had also lost weight while running. I hemmed and hawed over the decision, but after hearing about Katie's other Ragnar experience and realizing this was a once in a lifetime opportunity, I accepted the chance to make those memories for myself.

I am so glad I did because so many unimaginable things are coming from joining this amazing team, Weapons of Mass Reduction. Jen, who has had a successful career working in television production, has a production company with people she has worked with in the past. Media Meld Studios had produced a documentary called Happy On The Ground: 8 Days at Grammy Camp among other projects. She realized that our story can hopefully inspire others to commit to their health and see that what we accomplished can be achieved by them as well. From Fat to Finish line- The Movie was born.

So I'm going to be in a documentary? WHAT?!? I was brought into NYC for two days of incredibly fun things like a crazy workout with WWF wrestler Gene Snisky, a shopping spree with stylist Amy Acton in Macy's Herald Square and a complete hair makeover with Amalia Moscoso and makeup by Julio Rios. HUH?!? If that wasn't enough, I have a really crazy thing next week, but I just can't mention it yet. I'm just not one to say something and then be disappointed if it doesn't work out. Ask my kids. I don't usually tell them anything. They found out they were going to Sesame Street Live! in the parking lot of Nassau Coliseum, just in case we got a flat tire or someone got sick before-hand... I would just hate to tell them we couldn't do something. I also didn't want to field the 1,000 questions you get from little kids who have no concept of time!

Quite a year it's been. I KNOW this next year is only going to be better.

What Was I Thinking?

So I never got around to that 8 mile run this weekend. I did workout at the gym for an hour on Saturday, which I feel good about, but then, on Sunday, there was a blood drive in our parish center, so I decided to donate for the two free Mets tickets. I'm a Yankee fan, but our son likes them, so it would be nice for him and his father to go on an all boys outing together.

I sent my kids home with my parents and I filled out the donor form. I got my health screening done (my blood pressure was 128/70, a long way from where it was when I was obese!) and then got in another line for donating. I got on a stretcher and from start to finish was done in about 15 minutes. Removed needle, applied pressure, put arm down, removed gauze and blood pours out! I have NEVER had that happen before! The (cute) guy asked me if the prick on my finger continued bleeding, but the woman actually had trouble getting the 3 or 4 drops out of my finger that she needed to test my iron level. This was just a freak thing, of which he assured me he has seen before. We got the bleeding to stop, I sat and had my bottle of water and Lorna Doone's (I only get to eat them after donating blood!) and then I went to my parents house.

I decided to take it easy and not work out at all on Sunday. I remember having a horrendous run the day after giving blood, so I knew exercising the same day could only be worse. So on Monday I babysat and in the afternoon, instead of going to the gym, I decided to get back on the horse and do the Insanity Fit Test. I guess that's not "taking the easy route." I performed horribly. Now, I know I haven't done Insanity for almost two months, but some of my results were actually the same or WORSE than when I started! And by the end, I thought I was going to puke and die, simultaneously. I downed plenty of water and got in the shower since we were going to my husband's co-worker's house for dinner last night. The shower did not help, so I had to turn the water to almost cold. THAT helped. I can NOT believe how frickin' bad I felt! (I did recover and managed to get myself to dinner that night, but I am STILL feeling it! I am so sore.)

There are some great things coming up. The first thing is that we're on vacation starting today. My sister's sister-in-law (her name is Linda, also!) has a house near Lake Wallenpaupack in the Poconos, PA, so she asked if we'd like to go for a few days with them. I'm excited and anxious. First, a change in routine always (ok, almost always) sucks for getting in workouts and eating well. Second, my son has been experiencing anxiety lately about going places and I'm nervous for the long car ride and whatever else we might want to do. I'm hoping it's only because he's been home from school a month and has been in his little cocoon and needs to push through and realize everything is ok. He actually asked if we could stay home for his birthday dinner tomorrow instead of going to a restaurant. What kid doesn't want to go out to eat? It's definitely upsetting me and if things continue we'll be seeing someone to help him cope with it. And finally, when we go away I have to get someone to help with Molly, and I HATE asking people for help. Of course not one person could stay the entire time, so I have my niece and my sister staying with her. So now I have to go over the ins and out of the dog and the house and get them keys... I love my puppy, and I'll worry about her while we're away!

Happy birthday Charlie!

Along with going away, it's my son's 16th birthday today! I still can not believe it! He can get his driver's permit now. He doesn't seem to want to, since he hasn't been studying for it, but I want him to. I waited until I was 23 to get my driver's license and I don't want him to be like me! And thinking about his anxiety, I want him to start as soon as possible so he doesn't develop a fear of it. He does want to drive my car, though, so that should be incentive for him!

So then on the 31st my niece is getting married! She will be the first niece/nephew married on my side of the family. My husband's sisters kids are either married or engaged. Two of the three kids have kids of their own already. It makes me crazy when I think about it! The babies are having babies! I'm with my husband since 1991, so I've known them since they were about 8, 6 and 3. I hope my niece starts having kids relatively quickly so my parents can be great grandparents also.

Not Feeling It

I know, I know. If I just get up, dress the part, open the door and go, I'll get into it. 8 miles. That's a long run to push myself through on very little sleep. See, I stayed up to watch the Olympics opening ceremony and I had made it all the way to the P's in the Parade of Nations. Fast forward to 11pm (EST) and I wake up to my husband shutting off the television. Damn it! I missed the United States, (Couldn't we just go by 'America?' I mean everybody knows who we are AND I would've gotten to sleep at least an hour earlier!), AND I missed the lighting of the Olympic Cauldron!! I'll have to look it up and see what happened. I remember seeing David Beckham on a boat, and I thought I heard him say somewhere he wasn't lighting the cauldron, but that could've been just an evil plot to get us to watch and see.

Anyway, I got up and went to bed, only to wake up two times in two hours to use the bathroom. My husband, who was up playing on the PS3, asked me if I was okay. Me getting up several times in a night to release the copious amounts of fluid my body enjoys holding on to (and torturing me with on the scale) isn't uncommon. What WAS bothering me was the fact that I got my period. I, very stupidly, don't keep very good records when it comes to my cycle because I had my tubes tied in 2001 (April 3rd to be exact- now THAT I can remember?!?). So now I'm in bed tossing and turning, wondering when I got it last, thinking I just had it like two weeks ago and something HAS to be wrong! In bed, in the dark, everything always seems worse than it actually is. The diagnosis' are coursing through my head and the anxiety is building...

I fought the urge to just get up and go on the computer. I was too lazy to go downstairs and get the book I'm reading (since reading in bed is always a sure-fire way to put me to sleep, no matter what I'm reading). I just continued to toss and turn and stew in my own self-inflicted madness.

Now that it's morning, even though I've had very little sleep, I can remember thinking "Thank God I didn't get it while I was in NYC for my makeover trip." That was the end of June. So I had it in the beginning of July, and my cycle is anywhere from 23-27 days, so I'm not dying. Do you think this will prompt me to write it down? Don't bet on it. I am excited to try this new thing I discovered called 'Smart Cup,' though. TMI?

So now you know why I just don't feel like running this morning. Maybe I'll bang it out on a treadmill at the gym later. Don't hold your breath.

Just don't have it this minute.

Runner of the Month

I decided to enter the Ragnar Relay "Runner of the Month" contest on Facebook. So far, there's only 18 entries, so I may have a shot at it! I submitted the picture of me with Gene Snisky, before our workout, in my neon pink RR t-shirt. It's funny because I am 5' tall and he is 6'8" and he's standing directly behind me so you can really notice the size difference. And you get a good idea of the size of his "banana hands!"

The temperature was so nice yesterday (minus the torrential downpours)! It was so cool out that I wore jeans and a hoodie! I knew that meant it would be perfect for a run outside this morning. So, I said I would go for 7 miles today (after my 6 mile run last Saturday) and I DID IT! I think that was the furthest I've ever run outside. By the last mile I was really dragging my ass, but I did it. I have to say, the streets by my house seem to all have a hill, sometimes two. The last one nearly did me in, but I never stopped, never took a walk break. I was so glad to see my house and the bottle of ice water I had waiting for me on my stoop.

Not bad considering last year I finished my 10k in 1:04! I mapped out my route on www.mapmywalk.com and it said I did 7.23 miles. Now that would be REALLY impressive!

More Fortune Cookie Philosphy

I get it! In regards to weight loss and healthy living, smaller changes, like switching from whole milk to skim or walking to the post office instead of driving, are much easier to instill and maintain than big sweeping changes, like eradicating entire food groups (I could NEVER go carb-free!) or expecting to win a Strong Man competition when the only thing you've ever lifted was a fork.

Baby steps...

A Month

I can't believe how frickin' long it took me to lose a pound. I am my worse enemy, though. You truly can undo all of the hard work you do with a few poor choices, like eating sweet potato chips or cake and skipping a day of working out. Even though I know eating properly has a greater importance in losing weight, exercise and diet go hand in hand for me. It seems exercising early in the day keeps my nutrition on track.

My niece's wedding is August 31st. I'd really LOVE to be back under 150 pounds by then. That means I need to lose 5.3 pounds in a little more than 6 weeks. Can it be done? It's going to be a tough task... maybe if I blow the dust off my Insanity DVDs and kick it into high gear... then it will be done.

What can derail you from your goals?

Work In Progress

Why is it that I can think I have all the resolve in the world, but sit me around some sweet potato chips or chocolate cake with chocolate butter cream frosting with chocolate mousse filling and my brains fall out?

Katelynn and her dad

Yesterday was my niece's 5th birthday party (this picture was from last year), and I had some noshes that of course I didn't NEED, like the aforementioned sweet potato chips and some pretzels and some veggie straws. Dinner was bbq, so I had a burger, a bit of potato salad (not worth it), a little piece of sausage, a bit of skirt steak and some caprese salad. But then the dessert rolled around. The "eff it" mentality kicked in and I had a CostCo chocolate chunk cookie (SO worth it) and a hunk of that cake. This one had balloons on it, so I got a wad of EXTRA white butter cream on my piece. I dug into it like there was hidden treasure to be found. I couldn't finish. By the last few bites I was getting nauseous.

Dumb.

So, today is a new day. I did my usual arc trainer workout at the gym and came home to mow the front yard. I've been eating lighter today since we're experiencing our 4th frickin' heat wave of the summer. I am disappointed with my choices yesterday, but what I HAVE learned on this journey is that I'm not perfect, nor will I ever be. If I expect perfection, failure will definitely be the result. A day like yesterday would derail me for days, weeks or months in the past. Not anymore. That's progress.

Keeping My Nose To The Grindstone

Or "putting the pedal to the medal" or "holding my feet to the fire..." I said I would run six miles today and I DID! I think putting it out there on Facebook, either on Spark People's feed or From Fat To Finish Line's page, keeps me accountable. It was not an easy run. I went to the gym since I've run the last few times and they seemed to go faster since I became occupied with playing with the speed and whatever trash was on MTV, like 'Teen Mom' or 'Jersey Shore'. Today it was Retro MTV with an episode of 'The Hills.'

I had planned on setting the speed at 6.0 and not touching it- just run and read the captions while listening to my music. I couldn't do it. So, after 1 mile, I alternated between 6.0 and 6.2 every 5 minutes. Then it got tough around mile 4, so I would fiddle some more with my speed. I wanted to finish, and I wanted to finish under the 60:00 countdown the treadmill was set at. After huffing and puffing the last mile, I was done at 59:08. Thank you Jesus.

Glad to say I'm done with it! Do I dare say 7 miles next week? The Diva Half isn't until October 7th. I think I can take it a bit slower. Maybe I'll shoot for 6.5 and be pleasantly surprised when I just go for 7. I'm not promising anything until Friday!

This week has been busy with babysitting and cleaning and visiting with a girlfriend and her son on Thursday. Charlie met Ryan in 3rd grade, and his mom, Donna, and I hit it off. Unfortunately, they moved out of town and we don't see them very often. We all went to McDonald's and I had a hamburger Happy Meal. Have you seen the baby fries that come with a HM now? The cardboard container looks like it belongs in a little kids kitchen play set! They shrunk the fries and added apple slices to add some nutritional content, but they're peeled slices, so there's not much to them!

Not much food, but enough to fill the hole. Between my HM and the 4 others I got for my kids and the two I babysit, we got 5 of the same toys. Anybody need a Manny from Ice Age 16? That is what they're up to, no?

Right On!

So, my son opened an old fortune cookie for a snack (I REALLY have to go grocery shopping! He'll soon be digging into the cough drops!) and the fortune read:

I've always known losing weight IS hard work, but I've never looked at it this way. You may not see the numbers on the scale moving quite as quickly (or at all) as you would like with all of the miles you may be logging, but your body is changing. You may not see the benefits of cutting back on fatty, sugary foods immediately, but everything has a cumulative effect. Do BOTH regularly and results will follow. It may not be several pounds down on the scale, but it could very well be the difference between needing high blood pressure medication, or insulin injections, or having a heart attack or a stroke or NOT.

THAT is a pay off I am willing to work hard for.

99* In The Shade

So it's 94* right now at 1:17 pm, EDT, which supposedly feels like 95* because of the 36% humidity. I can't believe we're only at 36% humidity on the south shore of Long Island with severe thunderstorms on the horizon this evening. We've broken down and have been using the AC in the living room a bit more often this past week. I kind of like that it's so hot because it brings the family together in the same room (except that I'm in my bedroom right now writing this- oops).

Since I had nothing on the agenda today, I decided to go to the gym and finally make this week a 3 run week. It's been way too long since I've managed to run more than 2 times in a week. That's not at all conducive to running a half marathon in EXACTLY 3 MONTHS!! Holy crap! That just hit me right now. I hope to God it's 45* that day!!! Anyway, I wanted to run more than my usual 3 miles since I haven't been doing so well on working on my distance (as well as frequency). I did a proper warm-up of a 1/4 mile walk and then sped up over the next 1/4 mile. And then I was back. I haven't run on the treadmill in so long, and today I remembered why I loved it so much.

First, I could use my iPod without worrying about traffic. No one SHOULD be coming up from behind me on the treadmill, right? Lip-syncing to all of my favorite tunes really keeps me going. Second, I had a treadmill that had a working tv, WITH closed captioning AND a working fan. You don't know how many of their damn treadmills are missing one or two of those important features! And lastly, I can speed up with a few touches of a button and I can not slow myself down unless I push a button. When I'm out on the road, I'm always looking at that damn Garmin, speeding up, slowing down, telling myself to take it easy, the voices in my head toying with me...

I didn't feel anxious at all about this run! It seems every time I run out the door, I'm saying to myself or my poor husband that I don't want to do it. It's like I always have to do better than the last time. Now I'm TOO competitive! On the treadmill, I know how I'll do because the machine figures it out for me. I actually ran an 8 minute mile for a total of 5 minutes throughout my different intervals. And I managed to run 5.15 miles in 50 minutes. I haven't run that far in probably 2 months! I felt great. I was sweating my non-existent balls off, but I felt great. And then I cooled down with a 10 minute walk at 3 miles/hour, stretched really well and went home.

And when I got in the bathroom to take a shower I immediately felt like shit. I thought I was going to puke. I tried the "hand in the cold water" trick and that was just annoying. So I started rubbing my head, hoping that sensation would get my mind off the desire to puke. And the sweat was pouring off of me in my little cubicle of a bathroom. I guess the  20 oz. of water wasn't enough during my workout. Thankfully, sitting down and reading about Bethenny Frankel's new stint as a day-time talk show helped stave off the nausea, so I was able to jump in the shower and cool off.

So many people have been talking about how hot it is outside, (I know, I know, it's SUMMER, it's supposed to be hot), but I didn't realize how susceptible I am to the heat even INSIDE. What a hot mess I am! Literally! I thought I'd be good to go running inside. Apparently, that wasn't the case. So, PLEASE be careful in this heat, even if you're inside and exerting yourself! And make sure you check on the elders you know, who are most susceptible to this horrific weather!

Before "Before"

Gosh, how many times have you all started a weight-loss program over the course of your lifetime? After reading this month's issue of Fitness magazine (the one with Katie's blog winning a Fitterati award for "Best Weight-Loss Blog") and discovering that 25% of women attempting to lose weight couldn't keep track of the number of attempts, I realized I am one of those women. Now, I never joined WW or NS or JC or did any crazy food restriction (I did try the low-carb thing for like 2 days) or do the cayenne-lemon juice- maple syrup-water fast where if you stay on it long enough you eventually hallucinate, but I have started my "diet" on so many Mondays I couldn't keep count.

1992

I'd say I averaged 2 half-assed attempts at weight-loss a year. I can remember my first effort at losing weight being as young as the age of 12. (One of my sisters is 3 years older than me, and so, being 15 and in high school, she was trying to shed a few pounds, and I went a long with it.) I had been picked on for my weight. I've always been overweight. I can't remember a time when food wasn't the love of my life. So, if you do the math... from the age of 12-37, multiplied by the number of times per year I attempted to lose weight... 50 TIMES!!! 50 times I told myself I was going to lose ___ pounds, be healthy, never eat another cookie, look good, be a size ___, wear a bikini (LMAO!)...

9/17/95- I SO wanted to be a thin bride... a few months later I would weigh-in at 234 pounds at my first ob/gyn appointment, pregnant with Charlie. My highest weight ever was 251 pounds at the end of that pregnancy.

So it seems the 51st time's a charm. I was recently asked many questions about my weight-loss journey during my From Fat To Finish Line documentary interview. The one that stands out is "What made this time so different than all of the other failed attempts?" I think what made this endeavor different was a combination of things. I was older, sicker and more tired of being overweight. The health issues I was having combined with what my mom was going through with her battle with bladder cancer made me realize the toll being obese was taking on my body. There was NOTHING good coming out of it. There was no "pay-off" for me, as Dr. Phil would put it. And the realization that came with one panic attack was that death would come sooner than later if I didn't do something about my health. It snapped me out of it.

On my honeymoon in the most beautiful place in the world, Hawaii, not enjoying myself to the fullest because of my weight. What the hell was I thinking with that get-up???

Creating new goals has also been a factor in keeping me motivated, keeping the weight off; something I didn't do in the past. Running has supplied me with an ample amount of goals to achieve. I'm constantly striving to run faster and sometimes further. This month I'll start my half-marathon training. To be honest, it scares me to death. But I think about how far I've come and about the people who have accomplished astounding things after surviving so much adversity (especially Matt Long) or I think about the people that would give anything to be able to do what I do, and so I will get through it, to prove to myself that I can do anything.

August 2007

Got To Get My Mojo Back

Is it the heat? The humidity? I shouldn't be feeling like this on the 2nd week of the kids' summer vacation, a week after my tremendous transformation, not when I have so many wonderful things to be looking forward to. Just feeling blah. Before I went to the gym yesterday, (yes, on the 4th of July, my gym was open, until 1pm, thank GOD!), I whined to my husband that I didn't want to go, I just didn't want to workout. I asked him "Why does it have to be so hard for me? Why do I HAVE to workout nearly every day of my existence AND watch every calorie I consume to maintain my weight?" I was just so frustrated.

I said to myself I'd start with 30 minutes on the arc trainer. Start there. See how I feel after that. I did 15 minutes on Level 5 in the Weight Loss Program, and then went down to Level 3 for 15 minutes after that. After working so hard at that, going for another 15 minutes at Level 1 is a piece of cake (and pie), so then I did ANOTHER 15 minutes to make it an even hour, 15 minutes more than my necessary minimum for the day.

I felt great. I came home and logged my exercise on My Fitness Pal, and then logged the food I would consume the rest of the day since I was hosting my f-i-l and his girlfriend to celebrate their birthdays as well as our country's. I knew I was making hamburgers and chorizo, baked beans, some macaroni salad....

I cleaned the house, took a quick shower, prepped the bbq, and then my company came and I put out the noshes. Chips and dips, crackers for the cream cheese with sweet jalapeno pepper jelly (thanks to Tastefully Simple). Then all hell broke loose. I regressed to that 229 pound girl that never knew when to say when. WTF?

I then ate the dinner I had logged earlier and later it was time for dessert. So, adding insult to injury, I had some TS chocolate pound cake (which I DID make with vanilla fat-free yogurt instead of the 1 1/2 sticks of melted butter- hooray for small victories!) AND a piece of apple pie with fat-free Cool Whip on top. I don't usually eat pie. I mean it's dessert, but it's fruit. Never my first choice, but I went right back to that crazy mentality of thinking I blew it already, so might as well go for it.

I seem to be having more of these days lately. Why? I still am not exactly where I want to be, which I thought was 139 pounds. I'm fighting with myself, wondering if it's THIS much work to stay where I am, do I really want to do even MORE to get there? And yet I sit here, feeling as fat as I ever did, even though I KNOW that's not the case, focusing on my imperfections...

And just now, as I was typing, I heard a pinging noise, metal on metal, and it's in fact, meDal on meDal. Hanging from my closet handle are our medals from the Damon Runyon/Yankee Stadium 5k, blowing in the fan-induced breeze. They're a reminder of how far I've come, and I HAVE come a long way. Just 3 years ago I couldn't run an entire 5k and now, last month I beat my PR TWICE! This month I'll begin training for my first half-marathon. "Light bulb!" (Said in your best Gru voice from 'Despicable Me.') That's why I'm doing this, to be proud of myself, doing something all by myself, for me. I was never proud of myself at 229 pounds, no matter what I may have accomplished.

Hitting the gym.

P.S. 9:04 pm: I didn't go to the gym. I decided to eat dinner with the kids and do my workout later at night when it cooled off. So, I got my running shoes on and I hit the road. I actually left my Garmin at home, brought my tunes with me and decided to enjoy this. It was a bit cooler, but I still struggled with the humidity. It felt like what I can only imagine the start of an asthma attack might feel like- heaviness in the chest. I took my time and did my usual route. Turns out I ran 3.06 miles in 29 minutes. Not bad for a hot, slow run. The best part? Watching the sun set and running with the lightning bugs!

What A Week I'm having (Part 2)

Technically, last week is over, but if I changed the title then you would wonder if you missed something. It's just me being asleep at the wheel!

So I ended the last entry with Jen, Angela and I falling asleep watching 'Monster in-Laws' Monday night. That couldv'e ended one of those "You know you're getting old when _____" sentences! I did notice that I was feeling kind of sore after my workout with Gene. You know, the kind of sore that makes you look like an octogenarian bending down to pick up a dime? So when I woke up and Jen was heading down to check out the hotel gym, I decided to pass and take a shower instead. I was surprised when I came out of the shower to see Jen back. The gym had no treadmill! What kind of crap is that? I guess they figure you're in Manhattan, the miles will take care of themselves? Jen decided she'd like to take a run in Central Park and no amount of muscle soreness could keep me from joining her! I've ALWAYS (ok, since I began running) wanted to run through Central Park!

It was a nice walk to get up to the park, about 8 blocks straight up 5th Avenue. The wind sure was blowing, though! Other than a few gusts during our walk, the weather was perfect. Neither one of us knew where the hell we were going, but that made it even more fun. We wound up stumbling on Bethesda Terrace which is a beautiful spot with the huge fountain and a view of The Boathouse. Many movies have filmed there and many brides have wedding photos taken there. It's an idyllic setting.

The Grand Army Plaza, Central Park's southwest corner

Jen and I stopping during our run for a quick picture in front of the Angel of the Waters Fountain in Bethesda Terrace

We ran 3 miles through the park, enjoying the scenery, especially all of the dogs! After our run we went back to the hotel room to clean up, get some breakfast, pack up and check out of the hotel. Angela, Jen and I then headed downtown to the SoHo loft where the salon was to meet up with Molly, the hairstylist, and Julio, the make-up artist. I still can't believe I'm saying those words! My sister mostly cuts my hair or I go to The Lemon Tree and I've NEVER had my make-up done by anyone other than myself! Molly was so excited to be doing such a dramatic makeover. She said they called it the "playground" when so much is being done. We looked at some pictures on the computer to get a good idea of the style and color I wanted and then she went to town!

The consultation... That's Rich, one of Jen and Angela's colleagues, helping with the shoot.

That's Molly mixing my color and Marco, the owner of the salon, toiling away for hours doing a keratin treatment.

And I'm getting some highlights...

It took several hours to get the job done, then I put on the outfit, shoes and jewelry "the team" picked out for me and they took pictures for my "after." After all of that fun being queen for a day, it was time to head back to Penn Station and get on a train home. Angela and Jen came home with me to film my big reveal to Charlie and the kids and to interview us for the documentary. First, both Charlie and I were interviewed. He got a bit emotional talking about me and what I've accomplished. I'm not surprised. He cried at our wedding. He cried when we bought our house. He cried when the kids were born. He's an awesome person and I'm so lucky to say he's my husband and the father of my kids. I think he did a fantastic job.

Then it was my turn to be interviewed by myself. Can you believe I couldn't remember the exact day I finally hit goal? I actually had to go back and check My Fitness Pal. (FYI: I started MFP on 4/1/11 and hit goal on 8/20/11, just over 3 years from the start of this journey). I don't think I'll ever want to see my portion of the documentary! I hate hearing my voice and I probably will sound like an idiot! Y'all will get to make fun of my LI accent!

By 8:30pm Tuesday night, it was time to pack it in and bring Jen and Angela back to the train station so they could be on their way home. I had a wonderful time. I can never get enough of the city and this time it was a girls-only trip! That's new for me, too! So many firsts this trip!

I am so thankful for the opportunity that the Ragnar Relay team and being a part of the From Fat To Finish Line documentary has afforded me- the chance to complete my physical transformation. Now I truly look how I feel- young, healthy and full of life. Thank you Jen and Angela!!

If you want to see the finished product, you'll have to wait until it's posted on the From Fat To Finish Line Facebook page (Like it if you already haven't- there's lots to see about all of the RR team members!!) or when the film's website goes up! 



What A Week I'm Having!!! (Part One)

Quick!!! What movie is it from? (insert Final Jeopardy music here...) Ok, it's 'Splash,' but anyway... It was finally my turn (it felt like they got to everyone before me- NOT true!) to be interviewed for the From Fat to Finish Line documentary and did Angela from Media Meld Studios and Jen, from both MMS and our Ragnar team, have a whirlwind trip in store for me!!

On Monday, I took the Long Island Railroad into New York City and met up with Angela, Jen and stylist Amy Acton to head over to the iconic Macy's Herald Square. You know, 'Miracle on 34th Street?' It was a dream come true to shop in that store. I mean, I've visited at Christmas time, rode the ancient wooden escalator up to the 9th floor to see Santa with the kids, but I have NEVER shopped at Macy's. Browsing through the racks, picking out things that caught my eye, realizing the entire time that I didn't have to search for my size FIRST. If an item caught my attention, then I would find my size, because it WOULD be on the rack. Anything Amy picked for me pretty much fit. I think the first thing I tried on was a pair of cute green shorts in a size 6. Now, it wasn't a perfect fit, but they went on. That is a HUGE deal. FYI: My credit card and I are in BIG trouble!

Angela filmed us shopping the store, then me revealing each outfit and doing a very sad impersonation of a fashion model's twirl coming out of the dressing room. The funniest thing was when a random shopper came right up to Amy and asked her what the new discounted price would be on a sweater she was holding! Amy patiently tried to do the math and then directed her to the register where the clerk could just scan it for her. She could've just said "I DON'T WORK HERE!!!" but she didn't. She's a great gal and a true professional.

After Amy found the perfect look, the girls took me to DSW for a pair of shoes. I warned Amy I couldn't walk in heels, but I haven't actually attempted them since losing weight. It seems maybe being a bit (understatement) lighter and maybe a little more athletic helped? Maybe I'm exaggerating since I picked a cute tan strappy sandal with maybe a 2" heel? They did go perfect with the flowy, gauzy Bohemian top and the cuffed green shorts.

Before we knew it, it was time to head downtown to Circuit of Change, a beautiful yoga studio on 16th Street, for my "insane" workout with Gene Snisky who has been busy as an actor, WWF wrestler and personal trainer. I was a little intimidated by his size. He's 6'8", roughly 280 lbs. I'm NOT. He knew I had been doing Insanity, but I was off for a couple of weeks due to my bust schedule. Thankfully there were no free weights involved, and although he brought a jumrope, I didn't have to make an ass out of myself trying to use it on film. It would've only been worse if he made me hula hoop. He started me out with a warm-up of jumping jacks, push-ups and squats, 20 each, 2 circuits. I lived through it. Then he made me do all sorts of lunges and squats using a medicine ball. I didn't pop or break anything, so we can call it a successful workout.

He must've drank his Ovaltine!

That was the first time I've ever worked with a personal trainer and I have to say I liked it. Even though he's extremely large and therefore scary-looking, his training style is NOTHING like Jillian Michaels. He cheered me on and got me to finish most exercises strong without ever getting in my face. Gene must have known I would have broke down and cried (one of the reasons I would have never survived the military!) if he came at me like that.

After my workout the rest of the day was appointment-free. We checked into the hotel, The Jewel Facing Rockefeller Center. We ate a delicious lunch at The Terrace Club which overlooks St. Patrick's Cathedral and Radio City Music Hall. (Great shoe-string fries.) That night we walked through Times Square and enjoyed some people watching. We found a little place called Baked by Melissa with the most adorable bite-sized cupcakes, but we all resisted the temptation. Walking back to the hotel we stopped at Duane Reade and got some snacks for the night and found our teammate Katie's article in Fitness magazine!

Less than 50 calories per cupcake!

Jen and I pleased as punch to find Katie in Fitness Magazine!

Everyone was exhausted. Poor Angela had taken the red-eye in that morning, so I don't know HOW she was capable of doing anything by 9pm. We enjoyed our snacks, got to see some footage from the day, talked and shared stories and fell asleep doing one of our favorite things- watching reality tv! I'm still wondering how the episode of 'Monster-In-Laws' ended.

Falling Behind

It's been a long time since my last update! I still feel like a chicken with its head cut off! Thankfully school is over, so I don't have any more running around to do for that. I've taken a break from Insanity, only because I can't find the time to workout twice in a day with all the crap I've had going on. I'm still running and hitting the arc trainer or elliptical at the gym, though.

Last Friday was Relay For Life and it was just incredible. The weather was perfect which allowed for us to be outside at the high school track, camping overnight to ban together to Celebrate, Remember and Fight Back for all of those who have ever heard the words "You have cancer." So far, our event has raised over $75,000!

My family and I were just thrilled to see our mom walking the survivor lap again this year. She is doing so well compared to how last year started out. She walked the survivor lap, then the caregiver's lap with my dad and then the next lap when all participants walk together. That's 3/4 of a mile! Not bad for almost 77! She's always been a trooper, no matter what her attitude might have been during treatment.

My friend Joann, a 2-time breast cancer survivor, and my mom walking the survivor lap!!

Mom, Dad and our brother John

Charlie entered the Ms. Relay pageant again this year. Unfortunately, he was not crowned the winner. Maybe the third time will be the charm?

Charlie's on the left- "Deidre O'Rourke- Irish step-dancing prodigy"

So, most of us stayed overnight and didn't sleep a wink, including my kids! The RFL committee makes it so much fun, between the contests (there was a scavenger hunt this year), entertainment (Legworks, my daughter's dance studio, had several of their competition numbers perform) and themed laps (like slumber and birthday party, pirates and princesses and tie-dye to name a few), you don't want to miss anything! At 5:30am, bagels and juice was served and then it was the closing ceremony. Another successful Relay behind us, which made us look forward to next year's!

Birthday lap!

Some of the luminarias we made in honor of our mom.

Sun's up! Final lap- we are the All-Nighters!

It took most of the weekend to recuperate after lugging all of our gear back and forth to the car and walking mile after mile while staying up all night! I'm so happy we do it, though! This week was more testing for the kids and on Thursday morning we had Chelsea's 8th grade award ceremony. She got 'Outstanding Academic Achievement in Science!' So much for THAT stereotype! I still can't believe I am now the mother of TWO kids in high school! I definitely don't feel old, I just may look it! But that won't be for too long...

Half-way Through

Geesh! It's the 14th already! Almost done with all the June madness, thank the Lord above! I told you my life kinda unravels the last month of school. So, since Thursday, Chelsea had her dance and she said "To quote Grandma, it was fantastic!" My mom apparently says that a lot after the kids' concerts or recitals... She said it was the most fun she's ever had. Glad to hear it!

She looked so pretty in her $15 dress from Kohl's!

Oh, then on Saturday it was the Moriches Community Center 5k! Just a little local race with only 169 finishers, of which I came in at 62nd, 8th out of 32 women in my age category with a time of 26:35!!!!! I took 1:17 off my time from the 5k the week before!!! That was a MAJOR VICTORY! Don't know how I can top that!

Saturday night we had everyone over for Chelsea's birthday. I did cupcakes again. I made the pineapple flowers that I found on Pinterest! They came out great, but they take A LOT longer to dry in the oven than the 30 minutes on each side that the directions stated! (Wonder if I'll run out of propane now!) Sunday was spent at the high school from 10 am until 10 pm sitting through 3 shows for Chelsea's recital. The performances are amazing, (ok, not ALL of them are Broadway quality), but it's still an incredibly HORRIFIC long day! So glad to be done with the dance year!

Not bad, right?

My kids are finally done with "regulation" school. My son had a Global History Regents (NY state test needed for graduation) yesterday. He has 2 more Regents next week. Chelsea has 2 Regents and 2 finals left until she's done. Hopefully everybody passes everything. They do very well in school, but I just want them to pass these tests so they can move on to the next class and don't have to repeat anything. So much pressure!!

The icing on the cake is that tomorrow night is Relay For Life! We've been working since February, getting the team together, fundraising... I have to shop for decorations for our campsite- the theme is birthdays, which makes things SO easy! Charlie is a contestant again in Ms. Relay. His character is "Deidre O'Rourke, an Irish step-dancing prodigy with dreams of making it to Broadway one day." We are SO incredibly grateful and happy to see our mom walk the survivor lap again this year. What a difference a year makes! You won't hear from me for a little while. I will be the walking dead on Saturday since Relay set-up starts at 4pm, with the official start being the Survivor lap at 7pm, walking straight through until 6am Saturday. "Cancer never sleeps, so why would we?"

I RELAY FOR MY MOM!